How to Thrive in Nerve-Wracking Situations

October 8

Last week, I found myself facing the most nerve-wracking exam of my life.

It was a four-hour multiple-choice online test in a test center to become a PCC (Professional Certified Coach. I also needed to prove 500+ hours working with Leaders and Entrepreneurs). 

Surprisingly, instead of feeling overwhelmed, I was completely at peace—and even enjoyed the process.

This hasn’t always been the case. As a Ph.D. student, stressful exams were a routine part of my life, and I was often anxious before them, relieved only when they were over.

Later, as a rockstar photographer, I found myself in high-pressure situations like photographing a live concert in front of 120,000 people. At that moment, I almost had a nervous breakdown.

So what was different this time, even though the stakes were higher?

The shift came from a change in mindset: being unattached to the outcome.

This idea first caught my attention when I heard legendary music producer Rick Rubin talk about his approach to creating music. He said, “I don’t care if Adele’s album hits the charts or not. My focus is on producing the best music I can. The universe will take care of the rest.” That struck me deeply.

I started seeing similar ideas in other places—in the Bhagavad GitaA Course in Miracles, and Buddhist teachings. They all speak to the same core idea: focus on what’s within your control and let go of the rest.

I decided to try this approach myself. For my exam, I focused only on answering the questions in front of me. I let go of the fear of failure and the pressure of passing, and I stayed fully present in the moment.

The result? A sense of calm and, unexpectedly, enjoyment.

Being unattached to the outcome doesn’t mean you stop caring; it means you shift your focus to what you can control. By doing so, you allow yourself to engage deeply in the present, without being consumed by anxiety over what might happen next.

The next time you find yourself in a stressful situation, try this. Focus on the process, release your attachment to the outcome, and notice how much more peaceful and enjoyable the experience becomes. You might just find yourself thriving under pressure.

One question for the Weekend 

Where specifically can you be unattached to the outcome in your life?

I am curious to know.

Love 

Matthias


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